A.D.O.P.T.I.N.G.

Forgive me, because I am a bit giddy, so I may ramble.

Those of you who are reading this blog (yes, all THREE of you!) know that we have struggled mightily with infertility for well nigh about 6 years now. Struggled. I've been poked, prodded, bled, examined, had procedures done on me the likes of which no one should, and still I remain, with the exception of our one pregnancy, barren. I'm broken. The factory workers went home a long time ago and none of them want to come back. They're living on the dole and they're not going to work for peanuts. (A little infertility humour).

I first brought the idea of adopting up to my husband about two years ago. He asked me to try a little bit longer to get pregnant. I agreed. I prayed, and I told God a thing or two about how tired I was. I told Him that I needed some sort of sign. SOMETHING. Please tell me what Your plan is for us!

Then I thought about it. *I'M* adopted. My dad adopted me when I was younger. Oh sure, my mom is my mom, but he chose to take me on, and treat me NO differently than one of his own, and he adopted me.

And then I thought more about it. I didn't want to adopt internationally. Not when there are SO many children here locally that just need a family that will love them, and protect them, and provide them with the care and security that we know we can.

So I sent away for some information. And in return I received a DVD montage about adoption. And I cried like a baby throughout the entire show. Chris came upstairs to see why there was water dripping from the ceiling and sat there and watched it with me again. While I cried some more. And so did he. And then he said it. The words I had been waiting for God to imprint on his heart and spirit. "Let's go for it."

That was a few weeks ago.

This is now.

We've been accepted into the Oregon Foster Care Adoption program. I have a 2-inch binder with me at all times outlining the steps we need to take to prepare for our home study. It's filled with various paperwork we need to complete, and sign, and sometimes notarize. It's got a checklist of documents that we need copies of. We start our training classes next week. I've been to the post office to send off for our FBI background check. We meet with our family coordinator tomorrow to get a few more things signed.

It's been a long hard road, this process towards a Herren family. And me being the 'Type A' personality that I am, I'm blazing through getting all of the paperwork in order. Our counselor told us that most families complete the paperwork in about 8 weeks. 8 weeks? HA! I'll most likely have it done it TWO. And that includes the 51 page personal profile that EACH of us has to fill out. Are you listening dear? You have two weeks to finish it!

(He knows I'm kidding. He also knows I am the super-organized of the two of us, and just lets me do my thing. But he better get on that profile. No, really.)

And the outpouring of love and support that we have had from our family and friends has been, well, overwhelming. We didn't have a clue as to how any of them would react, heck, we didn't even speculate. I can truly say that it has been above and beyond what we ever could have imagined the support and cheerleading would be like. The people that we have chosen to surround ourselves with were good choices. And the ones that we asked to provide reference letters for us? They are our angels. They were all eager, willing and WONDERFUL about it. They're my heroes.

Of course, I'm at the mercy of the speed of the FBI and various government agencies performing our background investigations. But I'm praying. And telling God that I believe THIS is His plan for us. That I believe that He has had this in His mind for us since we started on this journey. That He knows that we would best be served by providing a good home for some children who wouldn't otherwise get that chance. That He is calling us for this purpose.

God always has a plan for us. It's just not always OUR plan. And I have made peace with that.

Horrible.

Me. Horrible. I can't even keep up the tiny bitty committment that I made to post to this thing once a week.

I have a good reason. I do. I just can't share it with the world proper for a few more weeks. No, I'm not pregnant. That chapter is closed.

We're settled into our new house and I absolutely LOVE my home. Really. I think out of all of the places we've lived and owned, this one is by far my absolute favorite. It used to be my 1958 little Connecticut house. But this 1969 split level with a walk out basement is doing it for me. I've lived in a brand new home that we built from the ground up and I am convinced after this purchase that I love old homes. I have a thing for them. They have character, and they're built WELL. I can't ever see myself buying new again, unless Chris and I win the lottery and build our dream home. At which time I will make SURE that it is built well.

We went to Home Depot and bought a raised cedar planter box last week so I could plant tomatoes, sugar snap peas, red and yellow bell peppers, cilantro (I could eat that stuff STRAIGHT off the stem!) and basil. I also bought two blueberry bushes. And now I'm reading that I most likely will not have fruit for 3-4 years! Whoops!

My mom and my sister have birthdays coming up this Sunday. Yes, both of them. On one day. I think they're both going to be 21.

And I have a baby shower to attend this Saturday. It seems everyone around me is getting pregnant. Almost like I am being tested. But as much as it may 'sting' for a minute, I'm ok. I'm happy for my friends, I really am.

And that's all I have. It's Friday and I am going home at 3.

Busy Times Ahead

I think I may have completely overscheduled Chris and myself this month. Well, it's not entirely my fault, but for the shortest month of the year, it's going to be a doozy.

This weekend is a wine event at one of the wineries we belong to, Willakenzie; a birthday party for a friend after that. Sunday is Superbowl - and we're headed to some friends' house for that.

Next weekend - Vancouver 2010. We're driving up on Friday, coming home on Sunday.

The weekend after that - Bon Jovi in Seattle.

Whew. Our cats are going to start thinking that we just don't live there anymore.

Prepare to Cry. Laughing.

I recently came across this - oldie but goodie - layman's translation of what happens when you take Alli. With the resurgence of the commercials, I thought I would repost. I literally cry from laughing so hard when I read this.

Enjoy!

Alli is a new over-the-counter weight-loss pill which, predictably enough, has proven to be a massive best-seller from the moment it became available. The drug, manufactured by GlaxoSmithKline, reportedly works by blocking the absorption of excess fats by the body. And folks are waddling, not walking, to their local drug stores for a chance to start on the Alli "program." As is the case with most drugs, Alli comes with a risk of certain side effects. Or, as they're known on the company website, treatment effects. A person is reportedly limited to 15 grams of fat per meal, and if they go over (or even if they don't), there's a significant chance they'll find themselves out behind a shopping center somewhere, crying and clutching a wad of horrifyingly soiled undergarments, searching for a place to ditch it.

As best as I can tell, anyway... Since a lot of this stuff is couched in language that is technically truthful, but very carefully worded, I've taken it upon myself to go through the list of side (treatment) effects and warnings, and translate it all into layman's terms.

I'm no scientist or doctor, and don't pretend to have any special knowledge. I'm just a person who's fairly good with words and reading between the lines... The highlighted phrases below are direct quotes from the Alli website, with my translations in between marked with **s.

Undigested fat cannot be absorbed and passes through the body naturally. The excess fat is not harmful. In fact, you may recognize it in the toilet as something that looks like the oil on top of a pizza.
**Here the drug makers are trying to soothe the nerves of the skeptical fatty, by speaking their language. Pizza is something fatties understand, and a big part of the reason they're interested in Alli to begin with. Pizza is good, pizza is reassuring...even when it's flowing from your ass like molten lava. The website mentions seeing the undigested fat in a toilet, but that's clearly a best case scenario. You might also see it on the tops of your shoes, across the hood of a car, or way up the shower curtain, near the loops.**

The fat passes out of your body, so you may have bowel changes, known as treatment effects. **Bowel changes. Notice how they phrase that? It means stuff will be happening the likes of which you could never have imagined. It'll be like a daily Dean Koontz novel inside your underwear.**

You may get: gas with oily spotting
**You'll be farting Wesson oil straight through your Dockers**

More frequent stools that may be hard to control
**all the time, with a sphincter that can no longer be counted as a friend.**

Eating a low-fat diet lowers the chance of these bowel changes. Limit fat intake in your meals to an average of 15 grams.
**The McDonalds Big Mac has 34 grams of fat, and the Burger King Whopper has 40. Eat either of these while taking Alli, and you'll very likely be transformed into a diarrhea cannon. **

Learning how to manage treatment effects is an important part of being successful with alli. Here's how to take control: Start trimming fat from your diet now, even before you begin taking alli. Then pick a day to begin taking alli, such as a weekend day so you can stay close to home if you experience a treatment effect. Make the timing work for you. If you're getting ready to travel or attend a social event, hold off on starting with alli until the event is over
**Blowing liquid feces down a row of bridesmaids, for instance, could be viewed negatively in certain circles. Further, an unexpected bout of the power-squirts while riding The Bullet at the county fair might not ingratiate you with your friends. Or anyone on the fairway. Or the folks in the parking lot walking to their cars. **

While no one likes experiencing treatment effects, they might help you think twice about eating questionable fat content. If you think of it like that, alli can act like a security guard for your late-night cravings
**You see, when you think about it, shitting yourself is actually a positive. **

You can't "save fat grams" from lunch and "spend them" at dinner. Spread your daily fat gram allowance of 15 grams on average per meal over the whole day
**Cheating can lead to embarrassment, tears, and the introduction of a frantically constructed toilet paper crack-wedge in the bathroom of an Applebee's. It's simply not worth it. **

You may feel an urgent need to go to the bathroom. Until you have a sense of any treatment effects, it's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work
**Until you get the hang of it, you should probably take along a rolling suitcase full of brown clothes everywhere you go, while taking Alli. Luckily, however, turd-colored clothing is in this season; turd is the new vomit. If co-workers ask about it, there is no shame in telling the truth. You might be surprised how understanding folks can be if you simply say, "I dress like this to conceal the poop that's constantly soaking through the seat of my pants." **

You may not usually get gassy, but it's a possibility when you take alli. The bathroom is really the best place to go when that happens
**Showboating is not recommended.**

You can use a food journal to recognize what foods can lead to treatment effects. For example, writing down what you eat may help you learn that marinara sauce is a better option than Alfredo sauce
**In addition to a handcart full of extra pants designed to camouflage your anal leakage, it might also be a good idea to carry a schematic and information wheel, so you don't repeat past mistakes and have a treatment effect halfway up your back.**

I hope this information has proven to be valuable.

Tax Craziness and New Ventures

It's tax season. Which means that I am not only hungover from the Holiday Season and moving, and all that came with that, but now I actually have to concentrate. I feel sorry for my CPA, he asks me things and I just look at him like I've never heard of a Form 990 or Prepaid Expenses.

Awesome.

On another front, I've decided to start doing a little venturing out on my own. I've put it out there that I am taking on contract bookkeeping gigs. I know, I just said that I have no clue about prepaids and why I have to book them, and I want to take care of other people's finances. HA! I'm kidding! I totally know what I'm doing.

No, really, I do. Quit laughing.

So I've made up business cards, and a flyer, and put together my business resume.

And I've signed my first client!

Awesome!

I've really been loving our new home. Chris and I have been working really hard to make it ours. We've made great choices in furniture, window treatments, and accessories. I know, I seriously have to get some pictures up here. It's hard for me sometimes when I am at home to decide which living room I want to sit in. The upstairs is our formal living, but has my "super chair" - an oversized, overstuffed armchair, with ottoman. I love that chair. The downstairs is our family room - and boasts a large down-filled sectional that is just plush.

My bedroom has become a literal sanctuary, and sometimes I like to lay in bed and watch TV in there, or read.

And that's all I really have this week. Some seriously random thoughts, but with substance, right?

Keeping my promise - once a week!

Mad Men. And four other things that made me smile this week.

1. I do love the show Mad Men. I also love that I can watch it on demand.

2. Everyone got double monitors at work this week. And they are LOVING them. Score!

3. We started a project in the downstairs bathroom. I think it will look fabulous when we are done.

4. I wrenched my neck and shoulder and have been having a hard time sleeping and, well, generally moving. My husband rubbed Tiger Balm on my neck and shoulder to help me feel better.

5. My clean house.

Sharing Cresmoor

I mentioned Cresmoor in my recap post and wanted to share pieces of her with you. Why is it that inanimate objects are more than likely female?

Anyway, here she is. Her front anyway.

And the kitchen. Good golly they did a great job.





These are MLS pictures. I need to get some pictures with OUR stuff. More later. I need to head to bed.

Struggling Today.

Whoa.

Yep, it's been a year. A year since I've been here. And to be honest, I am so glad that 2009 is over.

I can recap 09 in two words: Eff off.

In January, Chris and I went on a Mexican Riviera Cruise. We cruised with NCL, and honestly, it was meh.

In February, my husband had to relocate to Dallas to work at HQ. He would be stuck there for five months.

In April, I found out some potentially devastating news. It rocked me pretty bad and quite honestly, made me question a few things about myself and a couple of my relationships. I won't go into details, so please don't ask. The good news is that I am slowly but surely coming out of it. I haven't let it completely control my life, and I don't have that 'punched in the gut' feeling when I think about it anymore. Maybe a slap in the face, but definitely not a punch in the gut. I also had to move at the end of April into an apartment as my landlady wanted her house back.

In May, we went on a much, MUCH needed vacation with B&C and E&J to Puerto Vallarta. It was a week of bliss.

In July, we went to Cabo to attend my brother-in-law's wedding. THAT was a good time, despite the intense heat and humidity. It was also the Boy Child's first time in Mexico - and he had a blast. Chris also came home. He retired from Southwest, and took some much needed time off to decide what he wanted to be when he grew up.

In August, we took a little trip to Victoria, BC. I love Canada. I really do.

September Chris and I celebrated our 7 year anniversary.

October saw Chris getting a new job with a lumber brokerage. We also went to Wisconsin for Eric and Misty's reception. AND we bought Cresmoor - our new house.

November - we moved into Cresmoor the week before Thanksgiving.

December - Had a housewarming/my birthday/Christmas party. Lost a good friend to a tragic accident. When I think about it, I feel a huge hole. Celebrated Christmas. Thanked GOD that this year was almost over.

Yeah, yeah. It doesn't sound that bad. But trust me, I'm SO glad it's over. I'm over it!

So one of my plans (not resolution, cause that seems to jinx it) is to post at least once a week. Let's see what I can do! And feel free to call me out!

Merry Chrismahanukwanzukkah!

I want to wish all of my friends and family a very Happy Holiday - no matter how you celebrate.

My son is on his way via Santa Southwest, and I am looking around at my house and it is finally done! I've finally finished holiday preparations. I made 7 1/2 dozen chocolate chip cookies, raspberry crumb bars, chocolate peanut butter bars, and peanut butter cookies.

I've pre-made the "Make Ahead Breakfast Casserole", it's in the fridge. The dishes are done, the kitchen is finally clean. All I have left to do is set the coffee pot.

May you and yours be thankful for all you have this year. I know I am.

No, I Haven't Run Away To My Own Island...Yet

I know, I know. Once again it's been a while since I've been here. Well see, right about October 15th is when the Moving Crazy started. I had to get my office cleaned out, packed and ready to be moved by October 31st. In the interim of doing that, I had contractors at the new space, cable installers, phone installers, furniture installers, and appliance delivery folks.

Then The Big Move happened. On Friday, October 31st, we relocated to newer, nicer digs. But it wasn't over. I had phone issues, and furniture issues. I had HVAC issues. I had unhappy people issues. I have since, hopefully, resolved most of those issues.

And now here it is, December 20. The time just completely got away from me. But I was forced to slow down this weekend. I realized as I was wrapping up some HR stuff at work that I had 61 hours of PTO yet to take. Granted, we have a very generous PTO policy - 4 weeks per year, but I can only carry over 40 hours. So between now and the end of the year, I had to find a way to take 21 hours of PTO.

So Friday I took a half day and the things I got accomplished were amazing! I finished up some stocking stuffer shopping, I got my oil changed on my car, I made a few phone calls I needed to make. I cleaned up my house, which had come to look like a fraternity house between my husband and I never being home. (I fired my cleaning lady - I need to find a new one STAT!)

I wrapped the rest of my gifts and quite honestly felt good about the day.

Then there's my husband. Last Sunday was my birthday. He had to leave to go to work at 11 a.m. and wound up spending the night at a hotel near the airport. Monday he worked late and then again on Tuesday. Wednesday he got stuck at the airport again and got home late Thursday. Friday he went to work super early (on like 4 hours of sleep), and came home late. This morning he woke up, packed a bag and was back at it again.

Why you ask?

THIS:


Yes, there are many people that are all "ooh" and "ahh" all about it, but not me. I want my husband to come home. We were supposed to attend our "Christmas With Friends" tonight, but I had to cancel for us. One, I can't make it up the hill to their house in my vehicle, and Two, I wouldn't go without my husband to something like this anyway.

Sigh. Effing Snow.

Only in Portland

Only in Portland can the worst - and I mean absolute WORST drivers on the road be flaunting Obama 08 stickers.

Gah!

Hunting

So this morning I packed up my husband and sent him on his merry way with two of his friends to go hunting. They will be gone for 6 days. Hopefully they have fun and bring back some meat. That would be nice.

So my plans are?

*Sleeping all over the bed, not just on my side.
*Eating whatever I want, whenever I want.
*Watching Lifetime or whatever I want until my eyes explode.
*Going out with the girls on Saturday night.
*Dinner with the boy child.
*Dinner with a girlfriend.
*A baby shower.

And now I am hungry, so I am going to go eat. Whatever I want. *wink*

It's Our Anniversary

Six years ago today, I was getting ready to go out on the town with my girls and have my bachelorette party.

Six years ago tomorrow, I was watching my in-laws transform my backyard into a beautiful scene set for my Rehearsal Dinner.

And six years ago Sunday, I married the love of my life, the man of my dreams, and my best friend.

Happy Anniversary honey!

Labor Day at the Coast

Last year we decided, along with two other couples, to rent a beach house at the Coast to have one last long weekend and say goodbye to summer. We had such a good time, that we decided then and there that we were going to make a tradition out of it. This year we rented a house that was brand spanking new, beautiful and well-appointed. It had a hot tub on the deck, and a great view of the beach. We had a fantastic time, just hanging out, cooking, playing games, and being with each other away from the stresses of our daily lives.

So big thanks to B&C, and E&J for making yet another memorable Labor Day weekend!

95% Stuck on Stupid

I have literally had my ass handed to me for the last two days. Handed. To me. And it's only Tuesday. Sweet Mary.

I won't go into too much detail, but let's just say that 95% of the world is stuck on stupid these past few days.

In related news, I went rafting down the Deschutes with some friends this weekend and what a blast!! I did manage to wrench my shoulder riding the bull through a couple of the falls, and I also brought home a nice sized bruise on my calf, but overall it was a fun weekend.

I'm sitting here vegging watching the Olympics, thanks to that wonder we call TiVo! Only mine is just a DVR. Love it!

Have a great week! I know I'm trying!

Confessions of a Cheater. Part I.

I have a confession. I have been cheating. For so long now my loyalties have lied with one particular product, and now I have been sucked over to the dark side. Or the light side. Whatever.

I am a coffee junkie. My husband knows it, my friends know it, my family knows it. There's no secret there. And for the longest time, the 'Bux was my supplier.

Until last week. I decided to try the new McD's Iced Coffee. Oh Em Gee people!! It's a great combo of vanilla (or your choice of caramel or hazelnut), milk and coffee, perfectly iced, perfectly roasted, perfectly YUM! And on top of the yum, it's only $2.69. A full $1.00 less than what the 'Bux charges me for what my palate has now decided is burnt coffee. Sigh.

I will probably dip my toe back in the PNW coffee powerhouse during the holidays. Unless of course, my new love decides to foray into the pumpkin spice world. Then it's going to be a cold, hard Christmas.

Things That Made Me Smile This Week

Back for another installment. I'll include the 4th of July weekend since I was a lazy ass and didn't post.

1. Spending the Fourth with my husband and setting off fireworks. Including the ones we bought. *wink*

2. Making corn pudding and getting it right. YUM.

3. Getting what could possibly be the best news ever. It's top secret until the deets are worked out, but it looks good so far.

4. The week FLYING by. I love that.

5. Wednesday night chick flick night with C. PS I Love You. Sob.

That's all I got. Hey - at least you got something right? Now have a good weekend!!

An Example of When You Cannot Rest on Your Laurels

Paging M. Night Shyamalan. I need to have a few words with you. Let's begin at the beginning.

My love affair with you started with a little gem called The Sixth Sense. Oh the twist at the end. Loved how dark the cinematography was. And that little boy - Mr. Haley Joel! What a find! What a treat! What a fantastic little actor. I found myself crying at the scene where he was locked in the little room at the top of the stairs being attacked by the dead people. Oh my mother's heart wretched for that little boy!

You tempted me with Unbreakable. You temptor you. Bruce Willis returns and Samuel L. is always a good character actor. And the twist? Oh GOD the twist was delicious! Fantastic! That Elijah caused all those tragedies so that he could find his exact opposite in the world! How perfect!

You teased me with Signs. Mel Gibson AND Joaquim Phoenix? Oh dear sweet Mary hold me. The struggle between faith and doubt. The love of family and mending broken hearts. So good. Quite possibly your best yet.

Then I fell in love with you after The Village. Yes, there were impractical parts of the movie, like how did she run so perfectly through the forest completely blind? I told those blasphemers that when you are blind, your other senses make up for it. So she had acute hearing and sense of surrounding. And of course, you brought me back Joaquim Phoenix. I wanted to tear Adrien Brody limb from limb during the stabbing scene. And I like Adrien Brody. That's when I knew you had accomplished what you set out to with that movie. And I thought I couldn't love you more than that.

Then you hit me with Lady In The Water. Wow. I was a bit disappointed. To say the least. And that's where I'll leave that.

And then this weekend. I went and completely wasted 90 minutes of my life on a little ditty you called The Happening.

First of all, I noticed that you were Writer, Producer and DIRECTOR. Well, were you absent most of the time, because either the directing was horrible or the acting was horrible and I have seen Mark Wahlberg, and Zooey Deschanel in other films, and they do NOT act like they are at their first acting class with Jack McFarland. No they do not.

Secondly - a pandemic caused by plants? Seriously? I was waiting, hoping, nay praying that there would be a good twist. Alas, not so much. I'm a little disappointed. To say the absolute least. I expect better from you. It's your fault, you set me up with The Sixth Sense. I've got a bar and you, my friend, have failed to reach it this time. I think the only thing happening in The Happening was my wretched boredom with the whole deal.

I know you will probably never see this little rant of mine, but from one completely enamored fan, I'm hurt. It's like you are completely resting on your laurels and now as long as your name is attached to a pile of cow crap, someone is going to fund it. I find that sad.

Do me a solid Mr. Shyamalan. Make me something GOOD. And put Joaquim Phoenix in it. Shirtless. That would make up for it all.

Things that Made Me Smile This Week

Here we are: at the end of another week. What made you smile this week? Here's mine:

1. Spending all day Saturday with my husband. We shopped, ate lunch, and hung out. We rented a movie and just enjoyed being together.

2. My bike ride with C on Wednesday. Good times.

3. My venti skinny caramel latte. Tastes good and 1/3 the fat and calories of a caramel macch.

4. The last-minute camping trip we decided to go on. Yee-haw!

5. My husband coming home last night after being away for work all week. And subsequently waking up next to him this morning. That really made me smile!

Have a great weekend!