Friday, November 16, 2007

His Nobel Peace Prize is in the Mail

I am reminded, in little and big ways, every day, how wonderful my husband is, and how lucky I am that God brought him to me. He's my biggest supporter, my biggest fan, my greatest cheerleader, and he's smokin' hot! So that helps.

We had a small bridal shower at work today for one of the girls here who is getting married. Again. For the third time. What you need to know, though, is that this girl has had a tough life. I won't go into details, but there are perfectly good reasons that she ran smack dab into the middle of two bad relationships, and didn't realize it until after midnight when she tried to feed them.

At the little shower, we were all sitting around talking and she asked me how long I had been married. I told her 5 years, but that we would be together for 9 this March. Since I was the one person in the room who had been married the longest, she asked me how I did it. She also knows that I have been married before.

That's when my friend C interrupted and said "Because he's an awesome husband." I agreed. He is an awesome husband. He's a great friend, he's a wonderful (step)father, and he's a good son. I told her "See, my husband is SUPER laid back. And I, well, I tend to get a little riled up sometimes." To which the room chuckled, because it's true, I can be intense (or so I have been told). And my husband grounds me. He brings me back down when I am on the edge. He makes me realize that maybe, just maybe, I am getting all out of sorts for no reason. But, he'll also be the one to confirm when I have all the right in the world to be upset. He balances me out.

That's not to say we don't have our problems. I won't let him do laundry. And there's a REASON behind that. He doesn't let me clean the bathrooms. And there's a REASON behind that. Those who have known us the longest know that we just click, mesh, blend.

He keeps me sane. And for that, I love him more than he'll ever know.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

WBS

Recently I was in a discussion with a wonderful group of ladies on a private board I belong to and one of them said that she had WBS. Wanker Boss Syndrome. I adore that! Big shout-out to the Shev-meister, Breaker of Beds! *wink*

It was then that I realized, *I* have WBS. A huge, ginormous case of it. I then got to wondering - how many more of us have WBS? Is there an epidemic just running rampant in this country of WANKER BOSSES? It is very similar in symptoms to IBS, which is Irritable Bowel Syndrome - so I decided to do a side-by-side comparison. Strap in readers, this one is going to be fun!

  • IBS is a common disorder of the intestines that leads to crampy pain, gassiness, bloating, and changes in bowel habits.

  • WBS is a common disorder of your sanity that leads to your boss being a huge pain in your ass.

  • IBS can cause constipation, diarrhea, or both. People may experience a crampy urge to move the bowels but cannot.

  • WBS can cause aggravation, annoyance, or both. People may experience a crampy urge to lift their hand and slap the offending party upside the head, but cannot.

  • IBS causes a great deal of discomfort and distress, but it does not cause permanent harm to the intestines.

  • WBS causes a great deal of discomfort and distress to the employee, but does not cause permanent harm to the offending party.

  • IBS is often a mild annoyance, but for some people it can be disabling.

  • WBS is sometimes a mild annoyance, and sometimes can cause disability to control the amount of drinking you do after work every night.

  • IBS can be treated with fiber supplements or laxatives. Some prescription drugs that control muscle spasms and slow movement of food through the digestive system can also be prescribed.

  • WBS can be treated with a fifth of rum and a long week partying in Puerto Rico. Some prescription drugs may be able to help also.

See the similarities? I thought so.