Tuesday, November 06, 2007

WBS

Recently I was in a discussion with a wonderful group of ladies on a private board I belong to and one of them said that she had WBS. Wanker Boss Syndrome. I adore that! Big shout-out to the Shev-meister, Breaker of Beds! *wink*

It was then that I realized, *I* have WBS. A huge, ginormous case of it. I then got to wondering - how many more of us have WBS? Is there an epidemic just running rampant in this country of WANKER BOSSES? It is very similar in symptoms to IBS, which is Irritable Bowel Syndrome - so I decided to do a side-by-side comparison. Strap in readers, this one is going to be fun!

  • IBS is a common disorder of the intestines that leads to crampy pain, gassiness, bloating, and changes in bowel habits.

  • WBS is a common disorder of your sanity that leads to your boss being a huge pain in your ass.

  • IBS can cause constipation, diarrhea, or both. People may experience a crampy urge to move the bowels but cannot.

  • WBS can cause aggravation, annoyance, or both. People may experience a crampy urge to lift their hand and slap the offending party upside the head, but cannot.

  • IBS causes a great deal of discomfort and distress, but it does not cause permanent harm to the intestines.

  • WBS causes a great deal of discomfort and distress to the employee, but does not cause permanent harm to the offending party.

  • IBS is often a mild annoyance, but for some people it can be disabling.

  • WBS is sometimes a mild annoyance, and sometimes can cause disability to control the amount of drinking you do after work every night.

  • IBS can be treated with fiber supplements or laxatives. Some prescription drugs that control muscle spasms and slow movement of food through the digestive system can also be prescribed.

  • WBS can be treated with a fifth of rum and a long week partying in Puerto Rico. Some prescription drugs may be able to help also.

See the similarities? I thought so.

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