...and I am skeered.
It's June peeps. JUNE. The first day of summer is around the corner. Apparently, someone forgot to inform Oregon. Or Mother Nature. That bitch.
We had SNOW up on Mt. Hood last week. S-N-O-W. You know, that white stuff that falls to the ground when it's too godforsaken cold to rain? Yeah, that.
Have I mentioned it's June?
So I laugh every morning at our weather forecasters. Meteorologists. Lying whorebags. They keep promising me that it will be sunny and 68. Lying liars who LIE. That's what I say.
It's so bad that we have a name for it. Up here in the PNW, (Pacific NorthWest, cause I know SOMEONE is going to email me about that shiz) we are calling it JUNuary. It's been cold, and rainy, and wet. And miserable.
That noose in the garage? It's nothing, keep moving.
But today - TODAY - the meteorologistlyingwhorebag told me it was going to be Sunny! And 68! I went out to run errands at lunch and guess what? There was some bright light out there, the likes of which I haven't seen here in, oh, since the 3rd of A Long Time Ago. I actually had to put on my sunglasses. Seriously!
Anyway. According to the weather forecaster guy, it's supposed to be in the high 70's and SUNNY this weekend. It better be. Or else the national news is going to have a headline similar to "Oregon Woman Goes Crazy and Kills Meteorologist".
Hand to God.